This was a wonderful space to hang out in and share our thoughts! But now we've all moved on and simply left our memories behind :-) ...

Friday, February 1, 2008

I, me and BUF... (Ishita)

Hmmm… Not that I intended to get here today and do a post. But I guess it’s become necessary to do so. For one thing I haven’t made a formal announcement of my extended break from BUF though I have blogged about it in my ‘personal’ blog to which some of you do have access but it’s a different story that not many get around it. And of course another reason for this post is simply to question the absence of many of us from BUF. I think I know why Kesh feels the way she does right now because I’ve been through the same feelings many times over here on BUF. Every single time someone’s walked away with or without a reason. I don't know if reading this will change your mind about staying or leaving Kesh. But I know for a fact BUF won't be the same without you....

BUF by the way…just in case any of you didn’t notice…will be completing a year in March (and almost touching the 450 post mark...this one's no. 449) and amazingly it feels like more than a year has passed by when I look at the way BUF’s been. Personally, I think I lost more than gained here. But the optimist in me chooses to look at the positives rather than the negatives. That’s simply the way I’ve conditioned my mind. It may not always be realistic but it works for me.

I guess in many ways the loss of friends from BUF doesn’t hurt as much because I do still keep in touch out of BUF. What hurts is the loss of BUF as I thought it would be…could be….should have been. A huge part of my resentment lies in the way I probably handled it. I sometimes get confused as to which is the right approach. When I would email frequently and do updates and send out personal mails etc etc, some termed it pushy and asked for more freedom to post per will. When I made BUF more flexible and open, I found BUFer’s losing interest. I’m not sure what works best for BUF….or maybe BUF doesn’t work at all? It’s an idea like many that just fizzles away once the novelty is gone…maybe that’s it?

But I don’t want to sit and analyse it all here. I’ve been more or less off blogging and the virtual world for the past month…though the blogger in me does do the random post now and then on “Daily Dose” (my personal space). It has a lot to do with some changes in my personal life. These are days of complete relaxation and anticipation for me. I’ve been told to stay completely stress free so I intend to keep it that way!! I’m superstitious I guess which is why I won’t blog about it openly but you’re free to make your own guesses :)

And yes, my past experience in being an active BUFer has been anything but stress free :P … No seriously, I enjoyed it (despite the many mistakes I might have made) but the times when issues cropped up took a huge toll on me and people living around me, which is why I’ve been advised to stay off BUF in terms of handling stuff around here.

Of course that would mean having someone else or everyone taking the onus of keeping BUF going. I’d rather everyone did so. Make your suggestions in the shoutbox., do an occasional update, wish each other on your special days….etc. Just be interactive and hang around chit chatting. No one gets around here anymore…. It’s simply sad :( *sigh*

I will be back you know. I can’t be kept away forever. But I’m wondering what will I come back to? That’s the thought that plays on my mind….the answer to which I dread.

That’s all for now…I’m hoping some of u will drop by to read and comment and maybe come up with some answers.

4th February and 5th February are special days … Deepthi and Uttara’s birthday respectively! Nope I’m not wishing you yet :P but I hope to be around and write on your day uttsy :)!

9th February is Rajbir and Kavita's anniversary...another milestone...another year of togetherness :)

24th February is also an old long missing BUFer and dear friend to many...Kathy's anniversary. Miss u girl!

I haven’t accessed the team mailbox in ages. If I’ve missed any special days, I sincerely apologise. It’s not intentional at all and I want to thank Rajbir for the lovely dedication for Messy. Hope you had a lovely day and have many more such special and happy birthdays :)

Wishing you all a whole lot of reasons to smile :)

Ishi

13 comments:

  1. It's all good Ishi :)

    Do what you think is right.

    Btw is it what we think it is ;) ... Sorry if my mind's working too fast ... but congratulations! (correct me if am wrong)

    With lots of love.

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  2. welcome back ishi:=D

    hmm....well people always have differnt opinions as to what is right...the best thing to do is to listen to yourself....just put the question inside and listen...

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  3. honestly am at a loss as to how do i react to this one... kesh leaving is a BIG blow... and frankly, everytime i come around i don't see anyone out here... tried writing a few posts here... but lost impetus before i cud go ahead with it.. i dunno wot's happening!!
    do what you deem fit ishi, from wot i've seen and udnerstood u really r a good decision maker!!

    btw, if what loony thinks is correct.. then congrats ma'am!!! :)

    btw, 4th is on Monday right??

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  4. Hi,Ishi-I can very well imagine why you feel the way you do,especially since it's nearing a'birthday' for BUF,and,you find the posts pretty sluggish.I've been wracking my brains,thinking of ideas,and,did think up some-will put them together shortly and let you know...hats off to you for conceptualizing BUF,again.

    I'm thrilled that BUF has touched 450 posts,now.

    Nice list of celebrations coming up in Feb,I see..(*smiles secretly*)...and,this being a leap year,we have an extra day,too!

    Being an eternal optimist,I am sure things will perk up,people will free up some more time for BUF,and,things will be full of cheer by 08.03.08.

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  5. My dearest Ish and all my friends here,

    I dun mean to stress u but seriosuly wut has BUF become? Its empty and ppl come in randomly and just put up posts. Mebbe it should be just that? Wud u be happy with that? Since everyone's busy and Ish has alot on her plate rite now, mebbe it'd be good if whoever who's here write wutever they want to..that means BUF becomes a somewhat 'personal' blog to each of us who r here. Wud that matter to ya tho? I mean is it OK if that happens? I just feel tired of waiting for topics and also, Im fed up of me getting fed up of it :):). Thats why I wrote that goodbye post.

    Im not blaming anyone..its no one's fault. Its just how things happened for BUF...it seems to be it's FATE. So we hv to make do with wut we have. Waiting for Topics is a pain and I hate that...seriously. Mebbe let ppl hv their own Freedom here...cos that seems to be the trend anyways.

    U know I like BUF too much...thats why I get passionate abt it and then get fed up of it being so empty for so long. I know that not everyone can be here everyday and stick to the topics etc. So let it just be...let ppl post wut they like. Or let ppl pool in for topics every 2 weeks or so...meaning a different BUFer gives the topic every 2 weeks or so.

    This is also to take the extra stress off from Ish as well. I know she needs to keep away from such additional responsibilities rite now. Take it easy hun MWAH!

    Wut say guys? I felt so bad when I read all ur comments in my Goodbye post..I felt like a wicked witch LOL! I didnt mean to desert ya and leave...just felt so frustrated. Thats why I wrote it.

    Anyways let me know wut u think. tnxxx ALL n HUGS!

    Keshi.

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  6. btw...

    Sometimes its not only abt Writing on given topics...BUF is also abt Friends and Keeping in touch. Thats why I get so frustrated when ppl just disappear...atleast an occasional HI in the SB wud mean alot to BUF i suppose...it keeps it alive.

    ok talk to u soon!

    Keshi.

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  7. Dont thank me, it was the bootylicious one who reminded me of that, i just had no idea abt it.
    And thanks a lot for the super advance wish, though this time its within a week's time, it was almost a fortnight during my bday...phew!

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  8. South u hv nothing to say abt BUF's state at the moment apart from thanking for the one post u did? Ish talked alot more abt BUF on this post as well, if u didnt notice.

    I didnt wanna interfere with ur comment, but this place is abt FRIENDS...and that means u pool in thoughts for the future of this space and it just really makes me sad when ppl coolly ignore the real facts that need to be addressed and pretend as if nothing's wrong.

    But Im just wondering u didnt say anything abt BUF cos I was mentioned in this post by Ish? There was alot abt me here. Clearly u dun wanna contribute to that. I understand that and I dun honestly care wut u think abt ME (cos I now know who REALLY does care). But BUF isnt abt ME. There are loads of other friends of your's here...so atleast for their sake u cud hv suggested few things on Ish's and BUF's behalf? U dun hv to say anything abt me if Im that unlikable. This is abt BUF...not abt Keshi anyways.


    No hard feelings...just wanted to convey my feelings as I read ur isolated comment above. If this is abt BUF, where's the UNITY between FRIENDS? If ppl wanna hold grudges, this is clearly not the space for me.


    Keshi.

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  10. I was not here to thank her nor take any credit for that post, just wanted to let her know that i didnt even knew abt it, did that just coz i was told to do it.
    As far as buf is concerned and the way i look at it, i hv learnt it here on BUF itself.

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  11. South why r u taking everything so personally? As a fellow-BUFer I cant even ask u something in the comment section w.o. u throwing a tantrum and leaving the space saying u'll never see it's face again? Is this how FRIENDS discuss things? If we cant do that basic thing here like talking to each other and verifying things, w.o. flaring tempers, then wuts the point of being here anyways.

    I wasnt questioning ur THANKING her in that comment...I was asking u if u read the rest of Ishi's post apart from that bit. It looks like u coolly avoided the rest of teh post cos I was a big part of it too. Besides u commented on everyone's recent posts here EXCEPT my Au Revoir post. May I ask why? As a friend, I hv the right to ask that qn. No it's not my ego wanting u to comment on that post..but as A FRIEND..a long-term friend of ur's in Blogville, I thinl I hv a right to ask that qn. U JUST DIDNT CARE, even if I left. Thats why u colly avoided commenting on my post...its like, if she wants to go, who bloody cares. Thats the VIBE I got. And that seriously got me to qn wut kind of FRIEND u r to me. If Uttsy or Michi or some other BUFer put up a Goodbye post, Im sure u wud hv commented in it. So why did u avoid just ME? It's understandable...Im NOTHING to u.

    I really dun care South..I dun care wut u think of me or wut u say to me. Words dun mean anything. Actions do.

    As for u leaving BUF, it's not my fault. U decided it, so please dun blame it on me. Im not prepared to put up with that.

    Keshi.

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