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Sunday, August 12, 2007

a doll on my mind (messy)



i must have been 5 years old then... i was out shopping with my mom... i dont remember what we shopped that day... but i remember what i liked the most then... in those days there were no malls in india... (well... this should be around 25 years ago)... there were small shops around and you had to go buy stuff from there...

we were at this small, teeny, weeny shop... and my mom was checking some things in there... when my eyes fell on this beautiful doll... she was dressed in a pink frock... with long blonde hair and light blue eyes... i picked her up and started playing with her... she would blink her eyes at me... and sing a song and laugh with i moved her in a certain way... i instantly fell in love with her... i looked at mama pleadingly... but she refused to buy me the doll... she said she didnt have much money on her... she promised me that she would buy the doll later... i started crying and shedding pools of tears... (well... i was so in love with her... maybe i should even label this post as my first crush... errr even though i dont have such tendencies :p)... but to no avail... she wouldnt buy it for me... she pulled me out of the shop and took me home... i was really sad... wondering when would she have enough money to buy me the toy...

years later when i was 18 i was talking to my mom, and i recalled the doll she never got me... i still blamed her for not getting it for me... (i even threw a tantrum then... at 18! just coz she didnt get me a doll when i was 5 years old!)... she looked at me with a sad smile... she said come on, lets go and buy it now... i have the money now... that was the time i learnt a very important lesson...

when i was a kid we werent very rich (even though we lived well enough)... and my mom didnt always have the extra money to buy us toys and take us out... at 18 when my mom said that, i understood the pain she must have gone through to say 'no' to me... it was definitely more than the pain i went through without the doll... and since that day i try not to mention about the doll in front of her... (well.. sometimes i do kid about it... but i dont scream at her and dont blame her for not getting me the doll)

14 comments:

  1. hey..mom is alawys right..she must have been broken to say no to you..however she herself is a doll..ne...i keep screaming and fighting with mine,but at the end of the day all it takes is a cuppa coffee from her and a bear hug from me...

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  2. messy ben messy ben avya che..dhoom dhadaka karya che :P

    hmm...happens to me when am overtly demanding with my mom..but even then she manages somehow by taking some amount of money she keeps saving for us without anyone letting know bout it...i too hv realized since m 20 now :)

    and ive promised to buy a gift for my maa from the first salary i earn..

    u write as if we've both lived together some or the other time...hehe

    hugzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

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  4. k Messy this post made me cry...HUGGGGGGGGGZ!

    Like u, I was also in love with many toys when I was a lil girl...but my mum didnt buy me everything...actually I had very few toys. Im a girl who grew up with less toys and alot of handwork...I did my own stuff with clay, paper, art etc...and I loved nature so I was always outdoors chasing the butterfliesm riding my bike, watching the lil fishes in the stream or climbing trees :)

    My parents werent the rich parents who cud afford everything either. I rem crying sometimes wanting something so badly...but I neva got it. Anyways I guess we should be thankful to them for bringing us up with less WANTS...thats why we hv turned out to be better humanbeings today Messy.

    MWAHHHHHHH I love ur Mum!
    Keshi.

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  5. Hey,this is soo true-it's happened in childhood sometimes with me too.Times when I wanted something,it was refused(Rare),and I'd feel bugged.Only when I started earning myself,did I realize how difficult the refusal at that time must have been!Sigh.

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  6. Oops...that was me.AmitL..got posted via my other id.

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  7. Messy and Keshi: You both touch my heart. We learn to appreciate the smaller things in the legacy of our bringing up. I think thats what we did.

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  8. ty Aakash u said it the best!

    And Messy this doesnt mean out parents were poor..they just knew what it takes to bring up a child properly. And ur parents brought up one of the best girls in the world Messy!

    Keshi.

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  9. that was sucha heartfelt post...it shows ur mom instilled true values in u...otherwise wen i see kids today, they get everything they want!! i know a 5 yr old that has a nokia engage!!! spoilt for the worse

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  10. your post reminded me of the time i so badly wanted barbie but my parents could not afford it....and my mom did remeber my wish..and got me one years later..... i realised how much of life we mean for our parents..and how late we realise such things!!!!

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  11. mummmmyyyy...awww you know what my mum if i would ever say her i want that ...she will not buy anything for herslf but will make sure i get my things first n then she buys something for herself...I was such a pampered kid:)) this was when i was a small kid spoilt brat !!!

    N now my mom demands me...her latest obsession is a Camera Mobile or a flip one and it has to be Nokia N series .... My mom wanted to Join gym ...so paid her membership fees...she wanted to join Kitty party may be group of some 25 Ladies...OMG they talk so much ....so you know its like what i demanded when i was small ...My mom demands me now ...I love it :)))

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  12. awww messy,
    that was such a cute post.. ya all moms are damn sweet :)

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  13. hmmm.. yep this post touches a familiar chord. I learnt young what it meant to live within our means. Although being the youngest, I saw better times as I grew older :) ... but it's ingrained me for life I guess not too not stretch beyond...

    But mom did get me a barbie for one of my birthdays and it was as goood as new till such time I went to college and then I gifted it to my lil cousin whose smile on getting it reminded me of myself when I first held the barbie in my hands :)

    ps: I did save some of my soft toys for Vedant to play with :P ... nuthin beats passing down books and toys :) and see the same joy reflected in kid's faces na...

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