This was a wonderful space to hang out in and share our thoughts! But now we've all moved on and simply left our memories behind :-) ...

Sunday, July 29, 2007

Between Friends - A request

I owe an apology to everyone here.

Many of you are not aware of what happened or went on in the past few days. I am not here to give an explanation or understanding of it all. Some may be more aware than others because of your personal interactions beyond BUF.

It has a lot to do with me personally and I was wrong in letting it get to me to such an extent that it played out here in the blog. Sometimes I really seem to forget that BUF is beyond me. That is one my biggest weaknesses.

And I can’t sit and blame others for the total interruption that all this has got into the pace of the blog. I should have realized the fall out of my emotional outburst. Even to say that it came about in extreme conditions seems shallow when I sit and think of how much it took to get BUF this far.

In all earnestness and sincerity, I’d like to request everyone of you to simply focus on the topics that are running and the nominations for the Admin Team.

I’ve heard from many of you and it’s been overwhelming to say the least. Some have asked if I’d be back here. I never wanted to let go like this. Yes I wanted people to help me and take more responsibility here. Everyone has a sense of belonging but I wanted people to come forward and help manage … to get a sense of ownership.

I somehow find it really tough to come back after the way I reacted. Looking at me from another unbiased person's view -- I'd question my ability to manage BUF after this whole incident.

I find it even more difficult to let go because I practically lived, ate, slept BUF … it’s like my mind and heart pulling in different directions.

It’s after the anger and hurt subsides that we start to really see reason. I am still quite emotionally worked up I guess. Time will take care of that…

But now the focus has to be in keeping BUF going. It took a lot from many of us to get BUF where it is. It cannot come to even a pause…forget a ‘full stop’ just because I couldn’t control myself or others.

So please guys… just lets move on… that would be the only thing that could get me past all this too…

Thank you …

- Ishita


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  2. oye ye kya.. i just saw the last couple of posts.. humko kuch hawa hi nahi hai?!?! like really no clue.. whatever be the reason, i still think you are the ideal person to lead BUF..simply b/c you are the one here with max passion for BUF and leading without passion is useless. So pls come back!

  3. I completely agree with messy's comment in the earlier post and i hv repeatedly told u bluntly on other medias that its literally, u scratch mine and i'll scratch urs out here.
    The basic reason to support buf was to hv variety of ppl with diff ideas...Great minds think alike or maybe not...this sentence literally got royally screwed here. You will never accept one thing and maybe from ur point of u it might be right but from where i see, u had no business whatsoever getting into that scuffle, ppl involved there wud hv resolved that in their own way like they had been doing earlier. I agree that u cudnt take something like that in ur presence but practically it was an administrative failure and only and only for such incidences i offered u my help but the way i see it on the feedback page i was shocked. I was always under an impression that u needed somebody alongwith u to help u out on certain things and now its literally a full-fledged campaign out there..WTH, some thought i was appropriate, somebody thought i was an anti-social element, somebody thinks i m here to outlaw ppl, somebody thinks i do things half-heartedly and my question to all of them is what on earth gives them all the right to judge me and further nominate me? I do things when i want to and what i want to...DO NOT NOMINATE ME all of u!!! u need me on something u know what to do but not this by any means.
    And last but not the least like many other wud hv said this by now thru various media, spit ur anger and get back to where u belonged, as far as i m concerned quite frankly i m sick and tired and honestly i v my hands full with more complicated things....
    Good day!

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  5. Ish I read ur's and Vish's yday's posts and left comments in ur blog. Nobody emailed me or replied bak. I had no idea what was going on and still don't.

    Therefore I dun wish to comment on this matter. Usuaully I must know my facts b4 I put my 2cents in. But w.o. knowing WTH is going on, just by reading vague posts that has no clear picture of what took place, I refuse to be a part of this.

    As members of BUF, we r all here to have fun, and to grow with one another. And if thats too much to ask for, then I see no point in being part of this community. If all I see is ppl fighting here and then keeping some of us in the dark, then I dun feel I belong here.

    Hence NO COMMENTS on this. And if I dun need to know what happened, then I dun need to be here either.


  6. @ jitendra.. thank u. wl talk to u..

  7. @ rajbir: I had no business getting into a scuffle... ok your point taken.

    Understably everytime there is a ruckus around,I will sit back and let it be a free for all...

    And you offered to talk to the concerned ppl on my behalf ... so i guess it's a clear indication that you feel that I did not have any business clearing out probs in BUF. Sometimes Rajbir it's not about diplomacy ... it's about calling a spade a spade.

    They had no business getting personal on BUF. They didnt know how to be around others. When people walk into BUF, they should do so with a clear understanding of how this place works... If they bothered to care as much for people around... there would be no reason for me to try and look at the better interest of BUF.

    But knowing you very well, you will always stick to your opinion.

    And I am amazed at how you can even think that the term "anti social" was used in your context??? It's absolutely shocking to see you tow that line of thought. It was a statement made not in a general but in a specific context for a specific person. Anyway, I can keep defending that statement and you can keep taking it otherwise.

    It's sad. I never expected you to come out on me like this... never from you.

    I will admit I thought you were one person who'd know be better...

  8. @ Keshi ... It tuk me three days to bring some amount of reasoning back into my thinking. TO give you an understanding will be very difficult because I will obviously be very biased in my account of things.

    However you do have access to my pvt. blog and every single thing I have felt or experienced is etched out there...

    I understand how it feels not to know facts. But I think there have been many instances where I have not known facts about any prob that might've affected you but I went by my instincts about you... never gave up..

    Hoping you can help in getting BUF back in track...

  9. Fine u did what u had to do...

    Rajbir it's not about diplomacy ... it's about calling a spade a spade.***Diplomacy is something which has never been anywhere close to me, yet if u feel using that, i dont mind.

    And I am amazed at how you can even think that the term "anti social" was used in your context??? It's absolutely shocking to see you tow that line of thought. It was a statement made not in a general but in a specific context for a specific person. Anyway, I can keep defending that statement and you can keep taking it otherwise.***I never asked u a thing on that line, let the person who used that term come and defend...coz even if that was siad in general, i take it as a serious offence coz having hardly invested a few hours out here she cant come and get away with something like that. NO WAY!

  10. **But I think there have been many instances where I have not known facts about any prob that might've affected you but I went by my instincts about you... never gave up..

    I agree...that was always on my personal blog...not in BUF, was it Ish? When I did have a prob in BUF, i emailed u, telling u EVERYTHING..the whole story..and thats when u told me that others wud have moved so, I must move on too. U cud advise me well, cos I told the whole story w.o. hiding any bits from u.

    Anyways, that doesnt mean u hv to tell me everything too. Just that Im really confused as to what is going on etc and I cant really advise u on something that I dunno abt.

    ok I will go to ur other blogs n read. tnxx Ish! Whatever it is, Im not giving up...plz know that.


  11. I know the whole story it at the Feeback area. Altho I still dunno what sparked it, I sense it's to do with losing respect and dignity, calling derogatory terms and disregarding this very place BUF that we hv come to love so much.

    Why it happend is cos not all ppl in this world think and act alike. BUF is a place of different kinds of ppl. And this incident is proving it very well. Not everyone wud get along with everyone either. So if some of those ppl dun like u Ish, or they dun like some others here, well they r WC to leave. It wasnt them who started this blog right? So why should u leave? It doesnt make sense. SO STAY and let BUF continue it's beautiful journey as it always has.

    Stay calm amidst the violent storms...for doors may fall, but my mind shall not.


  12. I have often said and maintained that BUF is not BUF without you. I know how difficult it is to keep a community alive, to foster a feeling of belonging. And i know it i snot possible, unless someone is really passionate and willing to spend time to justify that passion. I can go blah blah about how important BUF is to me and how dear the friends i made here; but the truth is i cant dedicate myself to something as demanding as an admin's job. And when i cant do anything about it, i should not say anything about thw way it should function and all. We do live in democracy and it is sad that what happened here recently was the bad side of the coin.

    We all have had a great time here, and we all owe it to You and John who took pains and effort to keep us all together. The rules only made sure that chaos did not cancel out everything, what we in physics call as destructive interference.

    I know it hurts to see your own baby calling you names, but mothers dont give up, do they? The admin post is your rightful post, not only because you and John made this place; but also because I know you have the love for keeping this place up and running.

    Busy the hatchet, shall we. Here's to being between us friends again!

  13. You are very much loved indeeds Ish.


  14. guys!! can we just stop this thing?.. lets get bak to being friends..

  15. Well... this is a the Potter season... and keeping that in mind... I'll ask just one question: situation: things got personal...personal hurts!! and wen does that happen and hurt the most... wen everyone involved is someone for whom you have cared for sometime or teh other?? then u do share a relationship?? (remember the things we all said for VR??) The storm is over (I blv..), can we not rebuild it all?? we can, right??

    so let's get back to business - blog-shog, masti, timepass, dosti-yaari.... PLEASE!!!
    No one should go... a sincere request!!

  16. now that everything's sorted out (hopefully) .. we know we can expect u back ishita :D .. muuuahhh please don't disappoint me :) and many others!

    BUF belongs to u .. its ur baby .. use it .. exploit it .. don't leave it ... it'll be an orphan if u do .. seriously ... and am tellin u no one will ever be able to take care of it like u did .. do .. and will do ...


  17. Hear hear!!!

    *****thumps the desk madly*****

    Absolutely right... I say!!
    Sholo aana khati kotha!!

  18. i am droppign in real late.. bt im glad everything is sorted out.. Ishi, BUF is ur second puki. pl don't abandon it ever..

  19. rajbir, i am only here to tell you one thing........I NEVER RUN DOWN OR INSULT PEOPLE I CALL MY FRIENDS even if i misunderstand them.....def not in a public forum. I waited far too long to reply to all that you have been saying eversince telling myself to wait. I would have called you but...I had to make myself clear in the place where I have been wrongly alleged and then asked to defnd myself.

    Know what even after all this I will not say anything except I love you my are anti social when some1 else tells you i said that for you (I refuse to believe you thought that was meant for you! It was for the people who hurt & belittled ishi and made her contemplate quitting. Rajiv also made a comment there saying clearly that it was not meant for everyone in did even after that what kept you believing it was for you or any other BUFER??).....its not abt spending time here (sm regulars took so long to even decide of standing by a friend). It is all abt standing by my friend even when the world says he/she is wrong. I would (have) do(ne) the same for you or even for ppl who are habituated in losing friends perenially.....(specific statement)

    Ishi never differentiates between bloggers who sit here all day and those who get here when time permits......she gives all of us a sense of belonging and I BELONG HERE!!

    Last but not the least (here) - i have always been only a phone call/ sms away from you sweetie then why this? Not you, def not you....never you who knows me so well. it hurts...